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The Perfect Rider

by | Aug 12, 2020 | Rider Confidence, Rider Mindset | 0 comments

Looks can be deceiving!

As horse riders, we often consume a lot of our time and thoughts comparing ourselves to that of other riders. It is fair to say that we have all at some point come across what we would determine in our heads as the ‘perfect rider’.

Maybe it’s the way that the ‘perfect rider’ looks that makes you feel so envious. You’re pretty sure in your own head that you don’t look that way when you ride yourself. This makes you lose confidence.

It could be the way in which the ‘perfect rider’ breezes around the arena on their horse so effortlessly. You say to yourself that you could never achieve something so elegantly executed on your own horse which in turn knocks your confidence.

Or maybe it’s the way the ‘perfect rider’ looks so cool, calm and collected at all times. You wish that you were able to feel that way when you ride your own horse and exude that same confidence.

It’s natural to feel this way. We have all been there at one point or another. We just can’t help, but compare ourselves to the ‘perfect rider’.

But does the perfect rider actually exist?

The ‘perfect rider’ exists in your own head. There is no such thing as the ‘perfect rider’. Sorry to disappoint you. There are always ways you can improve and perfect your riding no matter what level you ride at. However, it is true to say that there are equestrians out there of all levels that ride to a very high standard and would appear to look like the ‘perfect rider’.

Although the riders you are comparing yourself to are not ‘perfect’ they all usually have one thing in common……..


This is absolutely key to your riding ability. Riding confidence issues are much more common than you would think and even some of the best riders will have had this type of challenge at some point throughout their riding life.

A lack of confidence builds roadblocks that get in the way of your riding and stops you from progressing. This has absolutely nothing to do with your ability and everything to do with your mindset. Confidence comes from within but is also something that can be easily covered up.

A typical example of this is seen regularly at shows and competitions. You will see plenty of riders who appear calm, collected, and full of confidence, but often this isn’t the case. What you see on the outside is not necessarily falling in line with what is going on inside. It is usually a huge cover-up operation.

What ‘you’ see is the ‘perfect rider’ in this situation, but in reality, it is possible this rider may be struggling with their confidence. They might not believe in themselves, but they don’t want anyone else to know the reality. With a mindset of this nature, it is possible that this rider is unable to achieve all they would like to achieve and attain everything they are capable of. They are not looking to fix the issue, but instead, are pretending that it doesn’t exist. This is quite possibly the worst mindset to have.

As equestrians, we tend to put most of our focus and money into our horses. We make sure that our horses are fit and healthy. They receive the right type of feed, stabling, tack, equipment, the list is endless!

We are also pretty good at spending a fair amount of time and money on ourselves. Investing in all the latest riding gear, going for lessons, and competing at events.

One thing we are often not very good at is investing in our own wellbeing. Particularly our mindset. If you think about the amount of money you spend on riding lessons every year I imagine for most of us this adds up to a pretty hefty amount? Agreed?


As great as those lessons may have been:

  • Was your confidence holding you back?
  • Did you know what you should be doing but struggled to actually do it?
  • Were you feeling like you were in a positive mindset?
  • Did you struggle with anxiety and nerves?
  • Did the negative committee rear their ugly heads in your mind?

Working with a rider confidence coach can be a great way to adjust your mindset and allow you to really be that confident rider you want to be. It can allow you to break free of the barriers and beat down the roadblocks that are preventing you from moving forward with your riding.

Here at The Everyday Equestrian, we believe every rider should have the means to conquer their fears in order to become the confident, calm, and courageous rider they’ve always wanted to be.

We are excited to announce that at the beginning of October we will be opening up enrolment for our signature Rider Confidence programme.

Crack the Confidence Code is your comprehensive guide to creating a new, positive, strong, and sustainable mindset around your riding. The programme combines the best in rider psychology supported by practical ridden training strategies and techniques so that you get the very best of both worlds.

This highly sought after programme is delivered online over a period of 12 weeks with modules taken at your own pace. This means you are free to study wherever and whenever you like. Conveniently providing you with the ultimate flexibility.

Each module is broken down into sections, making it really easy to access and implement, with a new module released each week for you to work through.

Resources include training videos and printable workbooks to support each module, containing a range of activities to help you take action and practice all of the tools and strategies with your horse.

All training sessions are conducted by Alison Buttery who is a BHS Accredited Professional Coach, and certified Rider Mindset and Confidence Coach. Alison has over 15 years of equestrian coaching experience and regularly works with horses and riders at all levels, who want step-by-step, practical, positive, and progressive training, in order to achieve their goals.

So what do you get when you enroll on the Crack the Confidence Code programme?

  • 12-weekly pre-recorded online training sessions
  • Clear, easy to digest, step-by-step resources
  • Downloadable workbooks
  • Access to case studies and real-life examples of how to implement a range of strategies
  • Clear focus on the practical implementation of the training
  • Access to a members-only Facebook group, offering community & support
  • Optional accountability partners to hold you to your goals
  • Lifetime access to the programme
  • 30-day money-back guarantee

Due to the high demand for this online course, we are opening up enrolment for just 1 week only! The next enrolment will be open from Friday 2nd October. So why delay? Sign up to our waitlist now to receive all the latest information and be the FIRST to access this exclusive programme – Sign up

Here at The Everyday Equestrian, we try our best to cater to everyone’s individual needs where we can. If you would prefer 1:1 tailored support to help with rider mindset and confidence issues, Alison also runs a limited amount of personalized training sessions via video conference call. More details about these 1:1 sessions can be found here – Read More

Ready to learn more?

FREE Rider Confidence Guide

I’ve created a FREE downloadable guide, packed with some of my most effective techniques, to help YOU become more positive and excited about riding again.

Everything you need to become a confident rider

  • Overcome your nerves, anxiety and those pesky ‘what ifs’ around riding your horse
  • Manage your mindset and your emotions, so you can be the rider your horse needs and wants
  • Follow a step-by-step proven framework to grow your confidence, whatever your starting point
  • Tailor your learning experience to meet your specific needs in your situation
  • Join an incredible community of riders who build each other up and share our successes along the way

The Rider's Guide to Managing Your Inner Voice

🐴 Are you really hard on yourself as a rider? Beat yourself up for every mistake? Hold yourself to unrealistic standards and struggle with perfectionism?

➡️ Break free from your ‘Negative Nelly’ inner voice and discover a more enjoyable way to ride with confidence! 

Dive into our exclusive Ebook, “Rider’s Guide to Managing Your Inner Voice,” and reignite your love for riding. 

✅ Conquer those nagging thoughts of ‘shoulds’ and self-sabotage

✅ Let go of perfectionism and avoidance tactics

✅ Transform your mindset and start making the best memories together with your horse

👉 Don’t let excuses hold you back any longer. Grab your copy now and start riding with confidence! 🚀🐎


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